Rat Leaves Submerged Ship
A pensive Micheál Martin watches as his former deputy walks away from government buildings following his sacking resignation MaFFianna Fáil’s Éamon Ó Cuív has resigned as deputy leader and party...
View ArticleOccupy Dáil Éireann Camp Untouched
One of the aristocrusties at the Occupy Dáil Éireann camp with two of his curs Everyone completely failed last night to dismantle the Occupy Dáil Éireann camp which has been in situ at Leinster House...
View ArticleIreland “Ireland”– Noonan
Minister for Honours Maths Michael Noonan reading the 2008 Leaving Cert Maths (Ordinary) paper set by his predecessor Mr Cromwell Parents of Junior Certificate geography students today thanked Michael...
View ArticleThe Austeribility Treaty: A Euroserf’s Guide
Tomorrow you will be asked to vote on the Fiscal Stability Treaty Referendum. This contains many important changes to Irish law. This contains no changes to what we’ve already agreed to. Under the new...
View ArticleKenny Receives Honour
Grown men and Pat Kenny wept openly yesterday as Taoiseach Edna Kenny (Mrs) was awarded an Iron Cross by VDZ, a German media group. The award comes with an extra meaty pouch of Pedigree Chum and a...
View ArticleScandal As Socialist DNA Uncovered In Labour TDs
Minister For Maintaining The Levels of Damage To The Underclass Joan Burton has angrily denied reports that minute traces of Socialist DNA were identified in routine testing of swabs taken from the...
View ArticleIreland’s King Kenny The Turd Found Buried Under Frankfurt Carpark
Tests on the mangled remains of what was once a man have proven “beyond reasonable doubt” that they are those of the much-maligned Irish king. The remains were unearthed during the excavation of a new...
View ArticleTributes Pour In For Elvira Gulch, Dead At 87
Elvira Gulch, the former Wicked Witch of The West, has died at the age of 87. Gulch, who ruled most of the central and western plains of Oz between 1979 and 1990, evapourated after somebody finally...
View ArticleCentral Bank Red Faced Over Money Error
Euros – not worth “a shite” It has emerged that coins and notes, released for use by the Central Bank of Ireland contain an error which may lead people into thinking that they are using an actual...
View ArticleFree At Last?
Minister for Shaking Children Upside Down For Their Pocket Money Michael Noonan gleefully addressed reporters in Brussels this afternoon, saying that the Government took the decision to exit the...
View ArticleTaoiseacheen: Tiny Lad’s British Visit Will Open Up “limitless and endless...
Taoiseacheen Edna Kenny (Mrs) briefly took Angela Merkel’s penis out of his mouth yesterday to gush effusively over the proposed official visit to Britain by poet and Uachtarín na hEireann Michael D....
View ArticleConspiracy Corner – Is Rob Ford Brian Cowen?
There is growing speculation that scandal-plagued Toronto mayor Rob Ford is in fact disgraced former Acting-Taoiseach Brian Cowen. Ford was stripped of the last of his meaningful powers after a heated...
View ArticleSinn Fein Leader Faces Dáil Grilling Over “Reappeared”
Sinn Fein leader Gerry Adams faces calls to address the issue of “the reappeared” in Dail Eireann later today. The popular city watering hole is to witness a debate on Mr Adams’ alleged involvement in...
View ArticleChupacabra For Social Protection Heralds New Era Of Certainty For Pensioners
The Chupacabra For Social Protection says that she believes that new legislative changes to defined benefit pensions will create a more certain landscape for customers. Joan Burton told RTÉ’s...
View ArticleUp To 75% Of TDs May Be “that much of a sociopathic arsehole sober”– Survey
Figures have emerged today that indicate up to three quarters of serving Dáil deputies may be just utterly inept and not routinely jarred as previously thought. It has emerged that only 17 deputies out...
View ArticleWaste Of Money “Wasted Within Parameters”
Your tax euros, working for YOU Consultants paid more than €32 million over the proposed development of the Poolbeg incinerator are to have their contract terminated by Dublin City Council in January...
View ArticleWhere Were You…..?
A President Lincoln Thousands still remember the day that they turned on the wireless, 148 years ago this year, to hear veteran newscaster Charles Veteran-Newscaster reading the now legendary news that...
View ArticleGilmore truth serum experiment works!
Tánaiste, Minister for Foreign Affairs and sexual firebrand Eamon Gilmore inadvertently sipped a pint of truth serum in the Dáil bar yesterday with hilarious consequences. [vine...
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